It’s a physical experience, not a matter of the will. 3 Tips to Get in the Mood After a Busy DayĪs you fill your cup with pleasure breaks, you will still need to switch gears from work, taking care of the kids and cleaning up after pets to get our groove back.įrom your work and mommy self, to your sexy self.Īnd for that, you need sexy transition time!Īnd that transition needs to happen in the body - because sexual desire lives in your body, after all. Your skin is wired to feel pleasure when touched - by your own hands included.Īnd our brain feels pleasure when we think of good thoughts, like being close to your partner or imagining a dream coming true. And when you pay attention to it, it can be an incredibly pleasurable activity. What it takes is slowing down to notice and feel it - one moment at a time. They give you an energy boost when you might feel tired.Īnd they help you feel in charge of your own life.Īll of that connects you to your sexual self - the sexual woman waiting to come alive within you. They reset your nervous system, helping you relax.

Infuse Your Day with Pleasure Pausesīy taking pleasure breaks - what I call ‘pleasure pauses’ - throughout your day, you fill up your tank. In fact, our bodies are pleasure machines - and the pleasure is ours for the taking. And the opportunities for these abound in every corner of your life. Realistically, it takes a few pleasure pauses a day (every day) to connect to yourself to fuel your engine. No, you don’t have to leave your job for that, or give the kids up for adoption.Īnd it’s not about making a weekly date night or scheduling sex. So to have energy in the evening for your partner (and for yourself), you have to take care of yourself during the day. (And worse, we blame ourselves and start to believe that we’re sexually broken.) Even when we're not in the mood, we expect our bodies to turn on for sex. Truth be told, that puts a lot of pressure on our bodies.Īt the end of a busy day, our bodies are like cars with no fuel. It’s unreasonable (and crazy!) to expect that if we work ourselves to exhaustion during the day, and we drain our energy to the fullest, we should still expect ourselves to be full and available sexually at night. Ignite Your Sexual Energy at Night by Focusing on Your Day You can create scenarios that enliven your body and turn on your sexual engine. You can take charge of creating contexts of pleasure that feel good.

It’s work - hard work.īut you’re in control of creating that pleasure … certainly more than you realize. Working hard to get in the mood is the opposite of enjoying yourself and feeling pleasure. It’s the truth that most women know intuitively: when we feel relaxed and access pleasure in our bodies, we feel sexy. Our sexual desire is an outcome of having pleasurable experiences in our body - by yourselves and certainly with our partners. It’s exactly the opposite of how it works. That’s because that is not how women’s sexual desire works. When we try to get in the mood - when we try hard to feel sexual and be sexual - we literally shut down every part of our sexuality. If you wait until you're 'in the mood,' you'll never be in the mood because life and exhaustion will squelch your desire. Trying to Get in the Mood Will Not Get You in the Mood In fact, they’re all about not having to be in the mood at all. This article will illuminate that mistakes that women make in trying to get in the mood and offer easy alternatives that do not require you to work at it. If you’ve ever hoped that one day you will be able to reconnect to that sexual side of you … If you’ve ever wondered how to break through this cycle … It’s shutting you down, making this an even harder decision.Īnd you just feel terrible … either way you go. You’re confused with how you think and how you feel. The torment of deciding between wanting to have sex and getting a night of restful sleep is freaking you out. Which, too, makes you nauseated just thinking about it. Or you give him what he wants and disregard what your body is screaming at you.

It’s either you ignore or shut him down, which feels terrible. “ Is there even a sexual woman inside of me?” you wonder. You probably feel over touched and over handled, like your body no longer belongs to you. Worse, if you’re a new mom, you just find the contact irritating. He wants to make love and you want to give him your love, yourself, your all. The long day has finally come to an end and all you can think of is finally sinking into your pillow.īut then, you feel your partner inching up towards you, and you can feel his sexual desire arising.

Sexy moods